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I Despise My Disability Stamp by raven-haven-creation I Despise My Disability Stamp by raven-haven-creation
Yes, It's been one of those days, which for the average person, would be just "one of those days." With my disability--brain damage from a TBI, depression, Bi-Polar-2, panic/anxiety, PTSD, abuse related psychosis,those days are debilitating. It's not merely a bad day. And, today, I despise it. I will, however, get past it; I just never know how long it will take.
~ Raven 2010

I am the one known as Ravenhood of Ravenwood. :omfg:
Swifter than the arrow :turbopoke: truer than the sword. :jedi:
You may refer to me as Raven. :cynic:

I have come to encourage the hopeless, :no:
to be a voice for the voiceless, :skull:
to heal the broken :heart:ed, :ambulance:
and, to open the :eye::eye: of the blind who spread injustice throughout the land :diny:

Embrace diversity. Embrace the world.

:police: PLEASE DON'T STEAL, BORROW, COPY, DOWNLOAD RAVEN MADE STUFF!

:bulletorange::bulletblue: ADD me to your :+devwatch: :bulletorange::bulletblue:

JOIN THE CLUB!!! :wave: RavenMadArt on DA [link]
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:iconvbluver22:
Vbluver22 Featured By Owner Jun 16, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I have a physical disability and i just get a bad state of mind and tell myself icant a lot, but i will say i have become better at pushing the cants out of my head :)
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:iconcoolgirl1314:
Coolgirl1314 Featured By Owner Oct 5, 2012
yeay they are a pain

i have learning disabilte and my brother have apsegerys *sorry for spelling <.<*
but we both got into speical classes while younger and they help us out ^^
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:iconcassity282:
cassity282 Featured By Owner Dec 1, 2011
i just happend to run acros this the day i needed to read it. thakyou for make it. i turn 23 on the 9th(next friday) and got kicked off a forem to day becaus they thought i was younger than i said becaus of my spelling.i shouldnt have to keep word open to spellcheck evrything i want to say.and i refuse to. thankyou. becaus to day that is how i feel.
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:iconraven-haven-creation:
And, your comment made my day. It's comforting to be understood.
Reply
:iconhtsasha123:
HTSasha123 Featured By Owner May 3, 2011
I have Speech Disability. It really sucks to not be able to speak properly to the point that I often get criticized and got misunderstood for what I was trying to say. -_- What's even worse was that I'm Asian and just because I'm Asian, many thought I'm an immigrant when I'm not. What's way worse is that I'm learning Disabled as well and because of it, it takes a really long time for me to be able to understand stuff comprhensively(espacially Languages). -.- My parents got really stressed out on me and payed alot of money on tutors for me because they gave up on helping me understand with my academics.
I'm also gifted as well which I find really hard to believe (probably due to my high marks in most of my academics except English and History). >.>
I wish having Learning Disability doesn't exist because it's ruining our life and chance to be successful. :pissed:
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:iconsancerianus0:
Sancerianus0 Featured By Owner Oct 12, 2010
General Anxiety sucks. :cry:
I'm not sure if I have that though, but i think I might because every single day, it feels like I'm going to die at any moment. ;__; It's scary as hell. I even feel that way right now.
I haven't gone to a Behavorial Hospital yet, my dad just thinks I need to eat more. :(
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:iconbleachyichi:
bleachyichi Featured By Owner Jul 5, 2010
i have a question *is a idiot* everybody in my family thinks im depressed and i have no idea if i really am
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:iconrabid-riolu:
rabid-riolu Featured By Owner Nov 9, 2010
I know what you said is considered old, but I felt bad that no one has answered your question yet ^^;

There is no way to know for sure that you are depressed unless you get a diagnosis from a specialist (psychiatrist, psychologist, etc.). Your family may be right, but they lack the education and clinical background to be certain. And a lot of times people who appear depressed aren't actually depressed -- not in the clinical sense, anyway. They're just really stressed out.

If you have insurance, meet with your primary doctor. He/she can then refer you to a mental health specialist if he/she feels you may be exhibiting symptoms of depression.
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:iconrabid-riolu:
rabid-riolu Featured By Owner Nov 9, 2010
...and after writing all of that, I clicked on your profile only to learn that you've been perma-banned.

Wow I suck.
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:iconraven-haven-creation:
I don't know what "perma-banned" is. Thanks for your comment.
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:iconex-nightmare:
EX-Nightmare Featured By Owner Jun 22, 2010
Ugh, tell me about it, Depression is a pain, ADHD is a pair, Anxiety is a pain and so is Dyslexia too. Heck, any mental disorder is a pain and this is a wonderful stamp you made here as well. :nod:
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:iconofthewoodsstudio:
OfTheWoodsStudio Featured By Owner May 4, 2010  Hobbyist Photographer
I feel for you... I cant even imagine how that feels like depression, ADD, and anxiety are bad enough for me now
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:iconraven-haven-creation:
raven-haven-creation Featured By Owner May 4, 2010
thx so much. Thank God for a good therapist and psychiatrist. :hug:
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:iconofthewoodsstudio:
OfTheWoodsStudio Featured By Owner May 4, 2010  Hobbyist Photographer
yes :hug:
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:iconrhayvennite:
RhayvenNite Featured By Owner May 2, 2010  Hobbyist General Artist
Days like today I REALLY fucking hate my disabilities ...
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:iconraven-haven-creation:
raven-haven-creation Featured By Owner May 2, 2010
See? It's nice to feel support, isn't it? thx! :tighthug:
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:iconrhayvennite:
RhayvenNite Featured By Owner May 2, 2010  Hobbyist General Artist
Yeah ... :huggle:
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:iconladyslaughterhouse:
ladyslaughterhouse Featured By Owner Apr 30, 2010  Professional Writer
You dont have a disability...you have a GIFT...oh honey...redo this stamp!!!
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:iconraven-haven-creation:
You're so kind. I know I have many gifts, talents. But, I cannot deny my disabilities. I was in denial for 20 years about the disabilities, and, it did nothing positive for me--only made it more difficult to live with.

Also, when my disabilities are debilitating, I get nothing accomplished. I love creating--it is who I am, my life. So, I hate that part most of all. The buttons I made, on the positive side, are: I WILL BE ME, YOUR APPROVAL, GET OVER IT, IT'S UP TO ME, and many others. It's all part of healing, in order to get on with my life as it is.

I am a voice for injustice, acceptance, tolerance, abuse, disability, etc. So, I'm speaking for masses of others who can't voice themselves for a variety of reasons. Being human means to accept our feelings and beliefs, not denying them because of brainwashing or stigma. I've gotten so far past the typical "I'm fine," at least internally. But, my artwork speaks the truth.

I love your message. It touched my :heart: Thanks so much for commenting. :tighthug:
Reply
:iconladyslaughterhouse:
ladyslaughterhouse Featured By Owner Apr 30, 2010  Professional Writer
as you touched my heart with your art...thank you.
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:iconrhayvennite:
RhayvenNite Featured By Owner Apr 30, 2010  Hobbyist General Artist
:huggle: I know how hard it can be to live with all that =/

Bipolar sucks. Abuse related Psychosis sucks. Anything related to the brain being impaired sucks ass big time ._.
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:iconraven-haven-creation:
Yep. Mostly, I think, because it's not physically obvious. People don't see a wheelchair, or missing limbs; they can't see what's missing on the inside. It's all difficult to deal with. And, like I commented, I know it will pass, but, in the middle of it, I'm lost in a deep, dark cave. :tighthug:
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:iconrhayvennite:
RhayvenNite Featured By Owner Apr 30, 2010  Hobbyist General Artist
Yeah ... Friends are great saviors when it comes to this :3

:hug:

Mmm most of my brain related issues are due to autism - but It wouldn't surprise me of I've done brain damage with all the ODs I've done too ^^; Either way - It doesn't really discourage me. I mean ... yeah, there ARE simple things that piss me off sooo bad. But then again - I excel in certain things such as literature so ...

Its also made me work twice as hard. And I always got a lot of praise from teachers :3
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:iconraven-haven-creation:
I agree with you. Everybody possesses at least one talent, no matter what problems they may be inflicted with. I have to work very hard at what I do; but, I'm thankful that I can do what I do. Creating is who I am. It comforts me, satisfies me, and is the greatest therapy (next to my therapist :hmm: heehee!)

Everyone has up and down days; but, everyone, also, has strong and weak points, which affects what and how they react to their personal situations, problems, and challenges.

I appreciate you sharing a portion of your life with me. True friends are definitely saviors! :teamwork:
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:iconrhayvennite:
RhayvenNite Featured By Owner Apr 30, 2010  Hobbyist General Artist
Yeah - they are X_X

I can't go to therapy. I lack insurance and out of pocket expenses are expensive ...

My biggest weakness is math work. I love it - but its so damn difficult ... I mean - I mess up on little things a lot. And when It comes to math - I often over think things.

But other things - writing specifically - I excel at. Reading I excel at (to an extent ;3 It takes me a loong time to read and I cant read out loud because my thoughts and the words get jumbled often resulting in tongue twisting, saying things that arent in the book, etc) It may be difficult for me to read - but I get soo much enjoyment out of it. Its a window to another world ...

Honestly - the only thing that bugs me is things I see - I perceive as "real" and as "happening right now." Because of this I cannot watch horror films or play horror based video games.

A great example - I was watching my friend play resident evil 4. I dont know what part I became as such - but it -literally- paralyzed me with fear. I blacked out - I couldn't move and I couldn't feel anything. My friends noticed this - and preceded to hit me XD At one point - one of them drop kicked me but I couldn't feel it and didn't move.

After an hour or s - I snapped out of it and was just like ... "what the hell happened?" They were more worried that I'd done died or something - but after they were pretty much sure I wasn't dead - they went on playing the game XD

Honestly - I dont see my issues as a problem. Honestly - they make life more interesting and more fun and I get more pleasure from doing things in life. Perhaps maybe because I have to work harder at it and therefore I appreciate it more?

I'm kind of mad at my graduating GPA - but proud all the same. I graduated High school with a 3.3gpa. So - I'm really proud of myself. Especially considering with the help and motivation of my teachers and on site therapists and counselors - I was able to complete my senior year with straight As all year <33
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:iconraven-haven-creation:
raven-haven-creation Featured By Owner May 6, 2010
I enjoy math, too; but, it takes me soooo long to work the problems. And, if they are long ones, I often forget where I'm at and have to start them over; and, sometimes--over, and over, and over :phew: It's very tiring. I took Logic one year, and, on the final exam, it took me the whole period to work one problem. And, I was allowed time and a half for my exams. I was so exhausted when I finished! But, I got that one right! hahaha! :trophy:

I'm also good at writing. I'm glad I found that out. My instructors were very complimentary, and, I'm happy for that.

I, also, love reading; but, am very slow at it. I get distracted easily. If I read aloud, my voice distracts me--haha! I think that's kinda funny. :giggle:

That's weird about your "horror" issues. The only problem I have with games, is, that I can't play...:hmm:...I can't think of the word...well, games that have a lot going on. It makes me having panic and anxiety attacks, and, sometimes, seizures. They overwhelm my brain with too much activity. I can only play toddler games, like Tetris, Bejeweled, etc.; although, I can watch people play games like Resident Evil, and, I rather enjoy watching. Just don't hand me the controller! :no:

I can see how one could learn appreciation from these problems. Personally, I have times when, of course, I "Depsize my disabitily," but, I, also, find that I get really excited when things work! heehee! For instance, just responding to your message is a major accomplishment for me. Sorry that it took me so long to get back to ya. Short messages are not such a problem, but, if they are detailed, my brain shuts down like an overloaded computer. :faint:

Congrats on your grades. I know how good that feels. :w00t: I've always enjoyed school. I love learning and exploring new information.

Keep up the positive attitude, Rhayven! Thanks for taking time to write. :hug:
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:iconrhayvennite:
RhayvenNite Featured By Owner May 6, 2010  Hobbyist General Artist
I sorry O:

Its actually quite common for people to have seizures due to Video Games. Especially with a lot of flashing lights and such.

And I love reading too! I want to get a new book but I Has no money. My dad hasn't payed me the 15 he was going to yet >.>;;

But yeah ... I dont know why my brain perceives it as reality but it does O: It was kind of funny though =P

And, while I enjoy math it gives me SOO Much trouble XD Definitely (HOLY SHIT I SPELLED IT RIGHT FOR ONCE O:!) isn't my best subject.

I do too! I want to scrounge the money together and get into a community college >.>
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:iconraven-haven-creation:
raven-haven-creation Featured By Owner May 6, 2010
Hey Rhayven, check this out. [link]
It's a book club that I belong to. You "trade" books. Only pay for shipping. And, free membership, too. I love it!

Good for you on wanting to attend a CC. There are a lot of resourses for financial aid, scholerships, and disabilities.
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(1 Reply)
:iconthe-blood-diamond:
The-Blood-Diamond Featured By Owner Apr 30, 2010
I don't really know you, or who you are, what you stand for, or anything like that. I DO know that you need a hug though. *HUGGLES Raven*

Have a good day! It's not all as bad as it seems.
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:iconraven-haven-creation:
Now, that is pure sweetness, and it warms my heart. I'm generally a very happy-go-lucky kind of person; but, days like today really are difficult for me. Thanks so much for you kindness! :hug: :aww:
Reply
:iconthe-blood-diamond:
The-Blood-Diamond Featured By Owner Jul 3, 2010
Pay it forward! If you feel that this act of kindness helped you, then go and do 2 more randoms acts of kindness in your community. Make sure to ask them to pay it forward!
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